dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize