yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
