And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
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