Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
