how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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