for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
