You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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