Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
