You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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