It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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