He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
