"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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