At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
