belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
