What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
