i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
only if we run a train.
done.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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