gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
