I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
