if only i could text you this smell
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
