i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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