he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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