Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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