apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
