I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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