dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize