It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize