You really coming over, don't trick.
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
where are my eyebrows?
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