if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
