Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
