Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
