Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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