My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
