Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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