Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
This toilet bowl is my home.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
