I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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