I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
So apparently I’m into choking now
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize