umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
