Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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