I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
