i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
