Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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