you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
