Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
