butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
