The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
