doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize