Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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