Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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