We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
