? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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