yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I supernannyed him into submission
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
