I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
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