i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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